Rainbow Cookies

I am so proud of this cookie. I'm sorry to gloat, but it was just so delicious. You are forewarned: if you dare attempt this recipe you will get yourself into some serious forearm muscle activity. It's probably a good idea to have a beater for this one, but I like to feel my food as I go along, and for me a beater just does not do it. So I used my forearms, and I am now sore as I type up this recipe. I must say though, it was worth it!

Recipe inspired by epicurious.com

Ingredients:

4 eggs
1 cup sugar
1 (8-oz) can almond paste
2 1/2 sticks (1 1/4 cups) unsalted butter, softened
1 teaspoon almond extract (I used vanilla because I was lacking)
2 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon salt
red food coloring
green food coloring
1 (12-oz) jar apricot preserves, heated and strained
7 oz fine-quality bittersweet chocolate (not unsweetened), chopped


Preheat oven to 350 degrees. If you don't want your house to get hot you should probably wait until you've reached the batter separation step, because preparation takes quite a while.

Whisk the eggs in a large bowl.
Add the butter. Beat until smooth.
Whisk in the (sifted) sugar.
Add the pure vanilla extract.
Add the contents of the almond paste can. I wish I had experience with this stuff so I could have thought of a better way to incorporate it, but I hadn't. I don't even know if you can put it in the microwave to soften it. So I dumped the can straight into the bowl and spent at least 10 minutes working it into the egg/sugar mixture. It eventually happened, after much fatigue.
Add the (sifted) flour. Beat until smooth and all flour is wetted.

Divide batter among 3 bowls.

Add red food coloring to one, green to another, and leave the third one alone.
Prepare your cookie sheets. You will have to cook the three layers separately, and then add them together at the end. So I used your everyday cookie sheet and lined it with parchment paper, with room hanging off the sides. I spread my 3 batters on three separate cookie sheets and did my best to make sure they were all the same size and shape.
Put them in the oven. Honestly I messed up and had to put the cookies back in the oven after undercooking them, so I'm not completely sure how long they took to cook. I'm thinking about 15 minutes. All I know is, when the batter is fluffy with a trace of shininess in the middle, you are ready to take them out.
Let cool for a while if you have the time.

Starting with the lowest layer (the green), with it's "flat-side" down, spread the preserves of your choice over the entire cookie.

Remove the white layer from the parchment paper and cover the jam layer with it. Proceed to add another layer of preserves.
Top with the red layer.
Chop up some chocolate, put it in a bowl and microwave and stir until it is melted. Atop the red layer, spread the chocolate evenly and quickly.
You can eat it now if you wish, but I think it's a good idea to let the chocolate harden in the fridge. So do that. Cover with a layer of plastic wrap and refrigerate for a few hours.

EATEATEAT! Surprise your people with your abilities! Make some people smile! YAY!

Thai Red Curry Chicken Over Rice

Ingredients: 1 can/small carton coconut milk, Aroy-D Thai red curry paste, sugar, can of bamboo shoots, Thai basil leaves, chicken (cut into bite-size pieces), basmati rice

Cook basmati rice in a large pot by toasting the rice first in oil and then adding sufficient water that will come to a boil and be absorbed by the rice. If you can, do not FULLY cook the rice. Cook it until it is almost cooked, if that's possible.

In a separate pan, heat up coconut milk.
Add as much red curry paste as you see fit. Some like it hot, some like it mild! Use your spatula to make it a part of the coconut milk consistency.
Add the chicken to poach. Toss as necessary.
Add the Thai basil leaves. Toss.

Add the can of bamboo shoots. The contents of the pan will become rather watery. That's ok, because you will be mixing everything together with the rice later.

Add sugar, to taste.
Add the green onions.Add the contents of your pan to the pot in which you were cooking your rice.
Let sit and stir for a few minutes until the rice becomes cooked and absorbs the juices.

General Tso's Chicken

A white girl... making Chinese food... this is essentially how I live my life, in the shadows of Asian people, trying to be Asian but never succeeding because of the size of my eyes and the color of my skin. Boo. At least I can make the food.....

Ingredients:

chicken, cut into bite-size pieces

canola/vegetable oil (for frying)

sesame seeds

shredded ginger, ~1 Tbs.

minced garlic, ~1 Tbs.

all-purpose flour

egg beaters/whites

2 green onions, chopped

1/2 cup water

1/4 cup chicken stock

1 Tbs. hoisin sauce

2 Tbs. sugar

1 Tbs. sesame oil

1 Tbs. dark soy sauce

2 Tbs. white vinear

1 Tbs. cornstarch

In a bowl, prepare your sauce. First, add the water and the chicken stock. Make sure the chicken stock sort of dissolves.

In the same bowl, add the hoisin sauce, sugar, sesame oil, dark soy sauce, white vinegar, and cornstarch. Let sit aside: you will need this for later.

Add sufficient oil to a pot so that the chicken can "swim". Let it heat up while you prepare the chicken to fry.

Prepare your chicken. First, add the egg. Swirl about so that all of the chicken has some of the glaze.
Add the flour. Toss your chicken so it is completely covered in flour.
Now, chicken is ready for frying. Put your tossed chicken in the hot oil and let cook for just a few minutes, turning as necessary. Once it is cooked, transfer to a paper towel where some of the excess oil can drain off.
In a separate pan, add a dash of EVOO and let it heat up. Add the shredded ginger and minced garlic and move around until the initial "sizzle" settles. Add the green onions and stir-fry for a few minutes.
Add the sauce you prepared earlier. Move around until it thickens a tad.
Add your fried chicken.Toss the chicken. When the chicken is fully glazed, add sesame seeds. Toss so the sesame seeds reach all of the chicken.
C'est tout! I apologize for the lack of attractive food photos, but here you go, the final product:

Thai Vegetable Fried Rice

You can vary this recipe up in so many ways, namely vegetable substitution in accordance with your preferences!

I used: 2 cups brown rice, 1 fully chopped onion, 2 peeled and chopped carrots, 2 chopped green onions, 3 eggs, 1 can baby corn, salt, dark soy sauce, regular soy sauce, garlic powder, chicken base

Cook your brown rice with some chicken base for flava (flav!).

In a separate skillet/wok/whatever you have, prepare your vegetables. Heat up some sesame oil and dump in the vegetables. Add some salt. Move around the vegetables as necessary so they do not burn. Leave them in there until they are fully cooked.
Add the rice.

Make a well for the eggs. Crack your eggs and let them fully cook in the middle. When they are fully cooked, stir-fry so they are mixed in with the rice.
Add the green onions.
I regret putting in the sauces before my last step because the pan was rather difficult to clean afterwards (soy sauce sticks and burns). You should put in your soy sauce, dark soy sauce and garlic powder at the end to stir-fry.
Serve as a side dish. Enjoy!

Peanut Butter Cookie Cups

So I was rather lonely today because I was dog sitting for a friend. I got a little crazy when I came home and make like 50 cookie cups. My theory about why this happened is loneliness is a form of mania, and I see mania as a driving force of ambition and creativity. Here, my ambition was making extremely unhealthy food for people to enjoy. Others do more productive things, such as making art and writing.

Cookie cups can come in many different forms. Here I present 2 'bases', one peanut butter and one chocolate chip. The chocolate chip one is a pre-made mix... I'm not necessarily the biggest fan of pre-made food, but it was in the refrigerator and I don't each chocolate anyway. The peanut butter is the one for me :)

Peanut Butter Cookie (Cup) Recipe
I didn't actually use measurements soo... these are estimates.
2 cups all-purpose flour
2/3 cup (light) brown sugar
2/3 cup Skippy's chunky peanut butter
1 cup white sugar
1 egg
1.5 Tbs. pure vanilla extract
1 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. salt
2 Tbs. milk

additives for bedazzling: Reese's peanut butter cups, any kind of chocolate (I used Toblerone), marshmallows, nothing, Reese's pieces, your mom

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Now you won't be making a batter for your chocolate chip cookie cups (why? because I said so!). Prepare yourself mentally to use the pre-made batter.

Now for your peanut butter cookies! So exciting!

Beat your eggs and add them to a bowl. Warm your butter in the microwave for ~20 seconds and add it to the bowl along with your peanut butter, milk, and pure vanilla extract. Mix them around.
Add the brown sugar to the batter.

Add your dry ingredients to your batter, namely, the flour, white sugar, baking soda and salt.
Finish your cookie cup batter. Try to make sure it is as even as possible.
Add your cookie cups to a baking pan that is either greased well or lined with muffin/cupcake wrappers. You should put in enough batter so that the cookie reaches roughly 3/4 the height of the well. Also, I recommend using an ice cream scooper.


Place muffin pan in the oven for 10 minutes, or at least until the cookies are cooked and slightly mushy in the middle.
Bedazzle the cookie cups as you like while they are still warm and sticky on the top.

This is exactly why you don't want to know my proportions. You will end up having enough food for 50 people.

Cookie cups are ready for their closeup!